Now: 2

I don’t suppose I’m the only one, but I constantly find myself second guessing my parenting decisions. There are plenty of books and help guides that claim to give you an insight in to the ‘correct’ way to parent. From what I’ve seen of these guides, they are pretty subjective. The problem is, they can’t apply to everyone, because every child is different, and what I have come to learn is, if everyone single one of these guides gave the same theory about a subject, my daughter, will be the child to disprove said theory. So I have been left with no alternative but to disregard all the books, and learn on the job.

Now I like a challenge just as much as the next guy. The mere fact I am still here, whole heartedly raising her, rather than sending her back to whichever planet she hails from, is proof enough of this. I do wonder though, how on earth am I supposed to react to some of the things she says and does? I mean whats the NORMAL way?!

For example, this morning, Darcy and I are preparing to leave the house. She’s been asked to get her coat and shoes on and instead, has completely zoned out because the tv is on. Now I take full responsibility for this situation so far, had I wanted her to listen first time, the tv should have been off. Nevertheless, I tried for a second time. “Darcy, can you get your shoes and coat on please”. Nothing, not a solitary movement of any kind. Now the tele goes off and with a significantly louder voice I say again “DARCY WILL YOU GET YOUR SHOES AND COAT ON NOW!” So far I consider this situation standard parenting, until she turned round to me and said,

“All right all right steady on”.

‘Steady on’? ‘Steady on’?!? See now at this point I have no sodding idea what to say or do. The last person on this planet to say ‘steady on’ died from the plague, and not only that, is my 4 year old daughter being rude to me by saying it? And even more questions arise:
Where has she heard this phrase?
Does she even know what she’s saying? I literally had no idea what to do or say in response, Darcy just stared at me waiting for some sort of reaction. It was definitely my turn to talk, she even had her arms raised up at either side of her as if to say “well?” I just stood there, like an idiot, before cracking up into laughter, to which she joined in. So now, she still hasn’t got her shoes or coat on, she may or may not have spoken to me rudely, neither of us know what the protocol is, and we thinks its hilarious.

This is what I mean by a learning job because I am telling you now, get yourself down to Waterstones and search till your hearts content – you will not find a book that will explain to you what to do in the event your child turns around, and says ‘steady on’.

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